to the person i almost considered "my life"

when you came into my life,
i told myself i would love you
and never gonna hurt you…
you were my bestfriend,
my love,
my everything…
til one day,you came and said,
“im tired,im afraid i cant stay with you any longer…”
i refuse to believe you at first,
but when i saw those tears fell down your cheeks,
it spells out the truth about how you really feel inside.
you were deeply hurt,i know…
i was hurt too…
you cant even look straight into my eyes when you said,
“it was too late…”
my life has changed at that very moment…
i just found myself on bended knees yelling…
why???
i was down,completely…
but i had to be strong…
until the day has come for us to say goodbye…
i knew it,but i just cant accept it…
if only i knew that was the last time,
i should have held you and never let go.
the kiss,whisper,and embrace…
it was the last…
i can feel your arms falling down slowly…
i know youre gone.
we always thought our love was enough for us to last…
it was a sad ending…
its God’s will…
i know you’re happy now…
and me,here i am hurting…
broken…
how can i forget all those times?
how can i start over once again?
i know i cant get you back.
this has been the longest moment of my life…
the most painful time i ever had…
the sadness of the night brings back the days we had,
the time you let go of me,
and the moment that i surrendered you…
even silence reminds me of all the sorrow…
the pain…
and my hopelessness…
let me suffer in silence,til i get over you.
slowly,i can let you go…
and i will be me once again.
i will be keeping my promise,
i will move on…
but you will always be,
a part of me…
hear me say this…
“i have found the essence of my life,
i have discovered a world that’s beautiful,
because of you…”
my love,my misery…
im letting go of you now…
its time to set myself free…
this is the hardest thing i will do,
coz i still love you…
and this love…
this is all i have…

my personal perception about love

at first, i thought, love is simple. ung tipong msaya k n kapag anjan ang taong mahal mo, pag alam mong mahal k rin ng taong mahal mo. but as i grow older, i realized n hindi lng gnun k-precise ang totoong meaning ng love. kung susuriing mabuti, malalim ang tunay n kahulugan nito. hindi to nasusukat sa kung ganu kau katagal magkasama, kung panu kau ngsimula, at kung ganu kau kasaya o kalungkot. ang tunay na pag-ibig ay nasa tao kung panu nya to kayang pangalagaan at kung pano nya kayang kontrolin at ipakita sa taong minamahal nya kung ganu nya ito kamahal at kung gano kalaki ang kaya nyang isacrifice to be with that person, to prove that his love is true. mahirap, komplikado. sa panahon ngayon, bihira k n lng makakita ng ganung klaseng tao, ung kayang ipaglaban k sa kung anu mang dumating na pagkakataon. msyadong ideal, pero gnun tlga ang love…mahirap para sa mga taong hindi kayang maintindihan ang konseptong ito, madali para sa mga taong naghahanap ng tunay na pag-ibig.

Christmas wish of my broken heart...

Ngayong darating na pasko, isa lang ang hinihiling ko, yun ay ang makilala at makita ang taong katulad mo. At pag nangyari yon, gagawin ko ang lahat para mahalin nya ako. Hindi ko hahayaang mangyari sa aming dalawa ang kinahantungan ng ating relasyon. Sa pagkakataong ito, ipagmamalaki ko sa mundo na mahal ko sya at ipagmamalaki nya rin ako. Pero meron bang kagayang-kagaya mo? Palagay ko’y wla ngang taong makakatulad mo.Ngunit s kabila nun, umaasa parin akong meron sa isang sulok ng mundong ito. At sa parte ng mundong iyon, sana meron isang tao ang naghahanap rin ng isang katulad ko.

why??

so many questions are troubling my mind now. and since the break-up, i hardly find any way to pick the broken pieces of my heart. i tried almost everything but nothing can ever ease the agony.. you certainly captured me with your charm and now i cant let go…

r u feeling the same way or it really doesn’t matter to u at all.. do u also feel the emptiness like the hollow portion in my heart.. r u fine as if nothing has ever happened.. r u happy now that u know that i am tearing apart..

How i wish time will mend the pain, but its been a month and i guess it will still take a long way.. for now, no any pain killers can relieve the sorrow but i must go on and live my life even without someone like you..

despite all of these, a part of me still wanting u to come back,.. a part of me saying my heart still beats for u and only for u… ill be a hypocrite if i would say i am okay; and behind my faking smile, the loneliness hides…

if ever u read this letter, i want you to know that i am still here waiting, and i guess i will forever be waiting,,, and i love you a million times a day…